Thursday, June 16, 2005

Feel bad, hell... I feel GREAT!

Today I kicked a patient out of my office. You've met the type-- always asking questions upon questions about his questions. Then when he gets his final answer, he says he doesn't believe you and asks another question.

We'll call him Walter, a 72-year old fairly frail gentleman that sucked me into his little game with his false kindness. At first he seemed like a nice guy-- told me a couple stories that I seemed to find mildly interesting. When we got done examining him, the bastard started complaining about my technique, my education, the way the pictures in the office were hung, and the way my staff wore their hair.

After making me completely repeat myself three times (no neurological problems, just a mean old man) and utterly wasting 30 minutes of my time (and 7 other waiting patients) I realized his game... his goal was to piss me off.

Successful approach, but since my "pain-in-the-ass-radar" tuned in, I just told him he'd have to see a specialist on Monday. Ahkam Hussein Mahammad was my referral-- a short guy with stubby little fingers that doesn't speak a word of English and loves to check old men's prostates. (Names have been changed to protect the innocent. Any similarity what-soever is purly coincidence, silly bungholio bastard!)

I can see it now, Walter and his friends will be picketing outside my office tomorrow...

(Yes, I did bill his insurance. It was coded 9920X New Patient Pain-in-the-ass Consultation $112.oo)


Blogger paula said...

Ugh!! He talked about my hair, Now I don't like the crochety old man!!!

10:53 AM  
Blogger Dave Morris said...

Well, as long as you got to bill him.

11:53 AM  

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